man is a stupid animal. And the stupidity derives from his intelligence. Wow, i am not fit to write this at this moment....but what the heck...who's gonna read it neways
well am home in delhi...in this crazy season called winter but the best part is the sunshine i get in the balcony....
the day before we had a badboys get-together...well a really small one....with S, Addy, P and me. I was looking forward to it...had not P for a long time (if we discount the skype chats from china)...and moreso cos I had not had a drink for a long long time....
but things have changed....it was not the same IMT style gathering.....we have moved beyond beautiful songs and ghalib's shayari....fair enuff....evrything has its life...but the new topics were something which made me uncomfortable.....'twas money....with five million dollar wine bills and 'leven thousand mobile bills discussed or rather flaunted....it was not the usual badboys bakar...and did i forget the case of two "dudes" who started as roommates moved on got married...got divorced and are back as roommates again...all in an year or so...the focus was all on the new lifestyle that the new money was bringing....and i just could not relate to it....it was not the others were approving of it...but they were accepting it at face value and were able to be indifferent towards it....i somehow couldn't....yeah i am a weakling...hah
i childhood there are things that are "strictly forbidden"...there are a few amongst these that most of us try out...but then there is a tiny group one understands would not be forgiven and we learn to live without it....the problem is that as much as i try and believe that i am open to new ideas the list i have built for myself is fairly long....the world today believes in shortening this list and i am too old fashioned or maybe too weak to shorten it.....but then i enjoy what i do...which may also include criticising a few things in my "strictly forbidden" list.....comeon we all like to believe money is not the thing...or atleast thats how it was in college....but the others could make strong statements putting money above all else.....
i have serious thoughts about not going to ISB now....i don't want money to be foremost....and i have not paid the acceptance deposit till now....:)....yeah 30th is the last date.....
and the day after P missed his flight to Patna....was with him till around 7 in the evening trying to get him into a train...finally managed to have him seated outside the toilet (on his bag) in sleeper class....gawd....that was one tough journey.....but then if i go to ISB would i be able to spend those hours with him....
and the day after i sat in the sunshine for 6-7 hours....reading a novel....or atleast trying to...gawd could life be better.....you read a para....close your eyes..catch a nap for five mins....and then read the next para...and doing it for 7 hours with no worry in the world.....and in those small naps dreaming of the fortune you are going to make when the days change.....and joining ISB would probably take away that dream that chance to sit in the sunshine.....that novel....i want to linger on with.....wats the point????.....but the hard fact is that i would have to join ISB....resist as I may......peer pressure is bound to get the better of me....i am real weak there...
but then someone suggested try and find a way out of the mess but to do that you need to enter the mess once.....yeah all this can be avoided....but then how'd i know that avoiding the mess was better unless i come through it....:)
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